Therapeutic Recommendations

The first step for the Social 4 is to confront envy: to realize that the comparison in which one constantly tortures oneself—where one always loses—is not an objective reality, but rather a neurotic motivation, an existential distortion that has served as a foundation for their identity. This comparison is a defense mechanism, and it’s time for them to redirect their envy towards an internal dynamic, removing the feeling of real inferiority and deprivation from their self-perception. It is essential for the Social 4 to understand that behind envy lies a wound and pain from their past. By connecting with this pain, they can reclaim their right to ask for what they need, take proactive steps toward satisfaction, and avoid remaining passive and mistrustful.

Therapeutic work for the Social 4 involves helping them recognize the limits of reality and their own limits. They must confront the demanding and unattainable ideal of themselves, learning to accept the right to be loved for who they truly are. Ultimately, the goal is for them to realize that the persistent cry and suffering from not being “adequate” are merely a fog, obscuring the real pain of loss. The work here is to mourn the true wound in order to stop suffering endlessly. In doing so, they will come to understand that shame is not a confirmation of their “inferiority,” but rather the emotional energy that cultivates an unrealistic ideal of perfection and uniqueness.

To heal envy, one must look inward and discover their own light, reaching the understanding that we are all equal and achieving true equanimity. To heal the masochistic component, it is necessary to undo retroflexion.

The work involves separating from the “mother” they once internalized. They must differentiate themselves from her, acknowledge the anger and hate they feel towards her, and connect this anger with the need for love. This anger must be redirected toward a "fair" rage for not having received the love and recognition they were deprived of. The Social 4 needs to amplify their sexual instinct to release and gain strength.

They must face the painful reality that their mother will never give them what she never could. If they lack maternal recognition, they must learn to give it to themselves and stop expecting it from her. If they remain trapped in the expectation of receiving this recognition from their mother, anger will perpetuate itself, because she can never provide what she doesn’t have. Even if she were to give it now, it would be too late, as the demand is that of a child. The lack of childhood cannot be reversed; what happened cannot be undone.

Working with the body is crucial for disidentifying from this internalized “introjection.” Only through deep contact with the body can one establish the boundaries between “what I am” and “what the other is” (the mother). This process breaks the symbiosis.

Once the Social 4 differentiates themselves from their mother, they can gain the internal permission to laugh, play, and be happy. The association of “pleasure equals pain” can be broken. They no longer need to punish themselves or hate themselves for what their mother did or didn’t give them.

The authentic healing of these mechanisms lies in the ability to “see” the mother without comparing her to an idealized version of what she should have been. Understanding the mother’s wound, accepting that she gave the love she had (even if it wasn’t what they needed), and realizing that it was all she could offer will allow for the internal integration of a new “good mother”—one who was never fully acknowledged. Through this, they can internalize that they are worthy of love and that they come from a good, creative source.

As long as the Social 4 feels their creative source is rotten, they too will feel rotten, because they believe they are its product.

It is crucial to understand dependency and the tendency toward destructive, unloving relationships. The E4 must learn to contain themselves and prioritize self-care over the illusion of a “salvific” relationship.

Body work must take a central place in therapy, as it is essential to release instinct and the spontaneity of the playful child who laughs, moves, and engages with the world. There is also sexual inhibition in this type, particularly in the context of explicit seduction and initiating intimacy. What frees the E4 most is a playful, joyful sexuality. Body work, including dance, can reconnect them to the awareness that they have the right to take up space. Group therapy can also be beneficial, allowing them to experience exposure and work through their shame.

Integrating individual therapy with group therapy is especially helpful, as it provides a protected environment in which they can learn to share themselves, grow in confidence, and experience belonging to a group without fear of judgment.

However, once the Social 4 begins to experience well-being in therapy and develops an awareness of their right to ask for what they need, they may regress. They might begin to disqualify their progress, labeling it as superficial, inadequate, or irrelevant. This is often a manifestation of their fear of change—resistance to shedding the mask of neediness and dependency. The fear of being alone and the anger about accepting the lack in their childhood world re-emerges. There is a difficulty in accepting limits, so they may retreat to the desert of their false self-image and distorted interpretations of others.

If this situation arises, therapy may be interrupted. Social 4 individuals are often adept at “cutting off” therapists, leaving them feeling helpless. Despite their deep empathy for

others' suffering, they have difficulty engaging in intersubjective relationships, where mutual vulnerability and connection can flourish.

Healing Work

Let me feel, listen to my body, leave my head, breathe, open my chest, my heart, feel the greatness of life, the invitation to enjoy, breathe and let go, let go of the heaviness, the shadow, the character, breathe and take the air, the sun, stop, leave me alone, look at the clouds, the plants, hug the other, let myself feel, bow my head, with you I am, I go and I am, I take a step and the earth is there, I hug myself, I lean on my feet, I jump, I move, I dance, I dance, I sing, I play, I enjoy, I cry, I love, I walk away, I say no, I look for your gaze, I look at you, my eyes smile, I ask you for a hug, I receive your hug, your chest, your caresses, I breathe, I scream, I get angry, I feel my guts, my strength, my anger, I express, I ask, I dare, I trust, it's okay, I like this, it's big, it's enough.

On a concrete level, it’s essential to work on commitment, dedication to what has been chosen, and the determination to stop doubting. There must be a focus on establishing structure and order in their work, maintaining a dignified place among co-workers, and avoiding self-idealization or self-devaluation. It is important to develop creative leadership skills—knowing how to promote oneself, speak well of oneself, tolerate success and abundance, and learn how to ask for and command respect.

Repairing Gestures

• Dare to confront, verify that you are not destroyed or invisible. • Dare to fight for what you want. • Develop strength from the feet, in the legs, and the belly. • Tolerate aggression. • Trust intuition. • Break the taboos of anger and pleasure—allow yourself to savor pleasure. • Feel and enjoy movement. • Take charge of the need for contact. • De-dramatize, leave the drama for the theater, do theater. • Be content with what others give you when seeking validation. • Embrace your sexuality with shamelessness. Allow yourself to enjoy pleasure without guilt. • Venture forth—become more active, say yes to action without overthinking. • Let go of shame regarding your talents.

• Embrace your anger, allow yourself to feel it in your body, especially in the solar plexus. Life has granted us the instinct for aggression; let go of the angelic ideal of never being aggressive. • Organize and structure your daily practices and disciplines while preserving your creative dimension.

Meditation and Equanimity

Contemplating nature, observing the small with serenity, without clinging, is no different from looking at the sky in the dark of night, when we realize we are but a small stone in a vast mosaic. In these moments, we calm down, knowing that we are in our rightful place.

Vipassana and Shamatha meditation can greatly assist the Social 4 in seeing both the internal and external world clearly, calming the restless mind and creating space for neutrality and deeper emotions. This space of neutrality, cultivated through meditation, can be integrated with the practice of equanimity—a virtue of the E4. Equanimity is the antidote to envy. Being equanimous means remaining centered amid the whirlwind of emotions and life, without being carried away by the polarity of suffering or the idealization of satisfaction. Having faith in the flow of life and divine providence allows the E4 to trust that life offers abundance for everyone.

Meditating on the joy of living can be incredibly healing.