Passion In The Sphere Of Instinct: How Sloth Works In The Self-Preservation Subtype

There is a duality—a contradiction, even—in how E9 with a Self-Preservation instinct experiences laziness. On one hand, there is a tendency to avoid self-preservation: doing everything except what would be beneficial, avoiding contact with one's own pain, and disconnecting from both oneself and others. It stems from a desire to forget feelings of worthlessness, the belief that one is not as valuable as others, and the sense that there is no remedy for their suffering. Deep down, something remains unforgiven, something that lingers and itches. To bury or cover it up, the person turns to various distractions—food, sweets, chocolate, alcohol, tobacco, drugs, or television.

"My tobacco addiction lasted for many years. I quit smoking in October 2010 after several cycles of quitting and relapsing over twenty years, sometimes going long periods without smoking. At times, I smoked two packs a day. The smoke hid my rage and helped me express, through ‘puffing,’ what was simmering below in my stomach—because I swallowed the smoke. I would be at the cinema watching a movie and already thinking about having a cigarette afterward. The same happened with workshops, training, and therapy. I couldn't go home unless I had a sufficient supply of packs." (Pilar)

On the other hand, the E9 with a Self-Preservation instinct has a highly developed survival instinct. At the last moment, an impulse to survive emerges, allowing them to do just that—survive. Their self-destructive tendencies run parallel to their instinct to stay alive. To maintain their existence, they make sure to secure the basics: money, food, shelter, work, and security.

"My conquest is to survive. And to survive, I have to control the external variables that might disrupt the expectations I set for myself. This is why, if things don’t go the way I want—sometimes even unconsciously programmed—they cause me distress and suffering. My reaction to this is violent and aggressive, both toward myself and others." (Jordi)

This creates a crossroads between the roles of victim and survivor. In the victim role, the E9 with a Self-Preservation instinct is consumed by harsh self-criticism, self-pity, and self-aggression. There is an addiction to avoidance, a strong resistance to self-exploration. Driven by self-destruction, they struggle to take responsibility for their well-being or to be brave enough to take the actions that would genuinely benefit them. Instead, they seek small pleasures—an exquisite meal, a glass of wine, or a simple icecream—as a reward for enduring the hardships of the day. Since their relationships are often unsatisfying, and they do not know how to share either their failures or achievements, they oscillate between total merging with others and complete isolation. There is no middle ground. They replace the joy of being with others with material comforts and fleeting pleasures to distract from their loneliness.

"Some time ago, when I felt miserable and had no one to share with, I believed there were only two options: either play the guitar and sing or let the music play on the computer while I accompanied it, singing sad songs from the records—emptying a bottle in the process." (Pilar)

Laziness in the Self-Preservation 9 often disguises itself as resistance—an avoidance mechanism that helps them suppress their thirst for connection, numb their pain, and evade deeper introspection. This is particularly evident in conflict situations. When confronted with tension, they tend to remain silent and avoid direct confrontation. For them, conflict does not exist; and if it does, they flee from it. However, they often complain afterward in a subtle, passive-aggressive manner or adopt the stance of a barking dog—making noise but never biting.

The body language and facial expressions of a Self-Preservation 9 can vary between two extremes. Sometimes, their presence exudes peace, tranquility, serenity, and trust—conveyed through stillness, inactivity, or an almost expressionless face. Other times, this lack of clear expression can feel unsettling to others, creating a sense of mistrust or even perceived threat. In reality, these are self-protective mechanisms used to manipulate the situation and avoid competition or struggle, which they fear might harm them.

The dependency that all E9s share manifests in the Self-Preservation subtype as false independence. It is a form of counter-dependence—a way of masking their need for others by constantly moving forward in avoidance. Beneath it lies a deep fear, leading them to apply a "bandage before the wound." Rather than risk rejection, they preemptively withdraw from relationships. Additionally, they struggle to take responsibility for their own thoughts and emotions, often needing an external point of reference—someone they deem wiser—to help them finalize decisions or choose a direction.

As they fluctuate between the extremes of victimhood and survival, they lose sight of themselves. They cannot truly look inward because they are locked in a battle between death and life. One moment, their personality feels nonexistent; the next, they find a surge of survival-driven energy, but it is filled with mistrust, aggression, and loneliness.

Another concept that helps to understand the passion of sloth in the Self-Preservation 9 is inertia—the resistance of a body to movement.

"Faced with Einstein's question, ‘Can the inertia of a body depend on its energy content?’ I ask myself, ‘Can the inertia of a personality depend on its energy content?’ And I answer, ‘Yes.’ This is the foundation of the E9, and in the Self-Preservation subtype, it remains even more deeply connected to its source of survival: vital energy." (Emilia)

Inertia, born from the art of forgetting, can normalize even the most significant trauma. It suppresses affectivity, thought, and—above all—energy. These elements still exist within, but internal inertia, linked to resignation, prevents their spontaneous flow.

When an impulse does arise, it usually comes from a desire to feel alive. However, these impulses are reactive rather than intentional—acting without reflection, without differentiating between themselves and others, without allowing time for processing. In such moments, they leap into life without a parachute, believing they have control over the situation, yet lacking real direction or pleasure. While this may superficially resemble the assertiveness of an E8, in reality, the Self-Preservation 9 does not operate from a strategy of power, nor do they embody the "I want it, I take it" mentality.

The Self-Preservation 9 possesses a great deal of energy but does not channel it effectively, nor are they fully aware of their potential strength. Their impulses resemble a geyser—sudden and intense, erupting from the gut to the brain, creating a fleeting sense of omnipotence ("from the stables to the stars"), only to return to inertia afterward. The outburst is powerful, like a jet of steam, but once it dissipates, there is no lasting satisfaction—no lessons learned. Why? Because they do not engage in cognitive processing or connect with authentic emotions.

"If I feel stimulated and engaged in a relationship, I enter the second principle of inertia: I start moving. And if the other person does not intervene to stop me, I can continue indefinitely, moving in a straight line without end. I don’t recognize limits, or—using the language of physics—I lack internal friction to slow down my reckless drive, such as exhaustion or the weight of sacrifice." (Emilia)