The Persona And The Shadow: For Those Who Are Destructive To Themselves And Others

In the Self-Preservation 4 character, it is possible to identify dark aspects and hidden parts that, though difficult to recognize, play a crucial role in one's relationship with themselves and with others. The awareness of these hidden internal characters often comes through

therapeutic work, as they are difficult to recognize but essential for integrating self-knowledge and harmonizing one's being.

The shadow of the Self-Preservation 4 character can be identified in the following roles: the envious, the inner judge, the hard-working, and the melancholic.

The Envious

As the Self-Preservation 4 is a countertype of E4, whose passion is envy, it manifests as a shadow effect, not overtly. Since the self-image is experienced as deficient and devalued compared to an idealized internal image, the individual pursues this ideal through constant effort and tension. There is a perception that perfection is distant and unattainable. This effort is fueled by the belief that once perfection is achieved, they will be special, will obtain the love they long for (which is often tied to fusion) or will gain admiration that compensates for their sense of internal deficiency. This inner perception of being special would manifest through the perfection achieved, leading to compensatory, admiring love and alleviating the deep fear of abandonment.

The Self-Preservation 4 relates to others with envy, fueling competition, which in turn feeds their efforts, resistance, and perseverance. This stems from a fear of being insufficient, making mistakes, and being singled out—fears tied to a constant sense of lack.

A subtle aspect identified in myself regarding envy is the inability to allow my inner child to complain during childhood or later in life. I get annoyed by people who are prone to complaining, unless the situation is particularly serious. This stems from envy of others' freedom to express dissatisfaction, a freedom I denied myself in exchange for recognition of my ability to endure. When this recognition doesn't come, the frustration is profound. – Roberta Ranalli

What the E4 deprives themselves of, in the name of resistance, becomes an object of envy, and even contempt when it is recognized in others. Often, it is about spontaneity, lightness, the right to complain, and the ability to get what they want. These desires, particularly understood as pleasure at all levels, are often prohibited for this character, and their denial becomes a symbol of how they act, feel, and think.

Envy, when unspoken and unexpressed, grows arrogant and all-consuming, especially when witnessing others achieve what they desire effortlessly. This creates a sense of injustice, as the Self-Preservation 4 believes others achieve their goals without the struggle they endure.

The Inner Judge

The psychodynamic relationship between E1 and E4, particularly the Self-Preservation subtype, gives rise to an internal voice that projects the outside world as a source of demands and mandates. A strong superego manifests in the character's cognitive framework, creating a judge that questions every step, behavior, and idea.

The discovery of this inner judge came late in my life, through psychotherapy. I had always felt an inner voice relentlessly demanding more from me, followed by disapproval for not doing enough or not doing it well enough. I was trapped in an endless cycle of searching for perfection, which drained and demoralized me, eroding my self-esteem. I believed that only by achieving worthy accomplishments could I gain acceptance and love. – Roberta Ranalli

The inner judge becomes a constant demand to do better, often leading to self-sabotage and devaluation. This internal voice can be cruel and sadistic, mercilessly condemning spontaneity and, at times, manifesting as a form of emotional abuse.

The dynamics of the inner judge extend beyond self-judgment and also express themselves externally, in judgment toward others, situations, or even through feelings of contempt, passive-aggressive behaviors, and emotional withdrawal. The Self-Preservation 4 may feel anger towards others who appear to live without self-judgment, particularly those who achieve goals in ways that seem less exhausting or traumatic than their own.

The inner judge causes insecurity and often leads the Self-Preservation 4 to feel like a perpetual loser, distancing them from others. This creates a perception of the E4 as distant, snobbish, or even contemptuous when, in reality, they are caught in a neurotic self-judgment that prevents relational spontaneity.

The Tenacious and Tireless Worker

In the personal history of the Self-Preservation 4, burdens are often taken on from an early age, especially emotional ones. This leads to the development of great resilience and the expectation of receiving admiration and love as a reward for enduring hardship.

Enduring long separations from my family, although deeply painful, made me feel like a hero who understood and helped them, without making demands, believing that the greater my ability to endure without complaint, the greater my recognition and sacrifice. – Roberta Ranalli

This character often represses childhood needs in favor of becoming useful, productive, and contributing to family needs. The repression of childhood desires (play, spontaneity, and fun) to conform to family expectations becomes a dominant aspect of their identity.

Carrying emotional or physical burdens, especially in the absence of family support, may be a way to anesthetize feelings and avoid anxiety. The desire to maintain a large work rhythm serves the dual purpose of gaining recognition and validating one's commitment and dedication.

However, this orientation can lead to competitiveness and rigidity in the work environment, making relationships with colleagues challenging. Despite being emotionally driven, the Self-Preservation 4’s strong work ethic can sometimes detract from their ability to connect emotionally with others.

The Melancholic

The melancholic character carries emotional self-control, repressing anger, sadness for the unattainable, and a deep distrust of life. This leads to a constant tension and a gray, unpleasant perception of the world. The individual feels overwhelmed by life and is often consumed by unresolved resentment and sadness.

For me, there has also been deep sadness, contained by the internalization of being strong.

I have denied and avoided internal suffering for many years. Above all, the suffering of childhood was minimized or ignored, and I took pride in this ability of mine to not give it space because it gave me a feeling of strength. — Roberta Ranalli

Melancholy is a feature that arises from looking at the past, at what could have been and was not, at what has not been done. It serves several functions: avoiding the present, avoiding contact with painful emotions, and refusing to take responsibility for the course of one's life.

At the same time, it can be seen as a return to a childish position— the child's lament for something he does not have or has not had.

Once again, melancholy has an outward implication. Not only does it burden personal relationships, but it also recreates relational dynamics similar to those of the family in order to preserve the original bond.

The Submissive

As someone who views himself through the lens of efficiency and control, the E4 does not recognize his submissive side. This side arises from obedience to the mother under the fear of losing her approval, and with it, love and belonging to the bond (fueled by a fear of rejection and abandonment). Since basic trust in a "good enough mother" is not consolidated, the child’s rebellion is also not established. A significant part of the fear of aggression remains hidden, transforming into self-aggression. Another part is transformed into a fear of conflict, which, when it occurs and if the accumulation of resentment is substantial, leads to paralysis and eventual explosion.

This imbalance in the regulation of aggression generates difficulties in being assertive, indecisiveness, hypersensitivity to criticism, and difficulty in assessing the version of the opponent or the magnitude of the conflict. These issues ultimately create resentment towards the opponent(s), since a significant portion of the aggression perceived externally is a projection of self-aggression. The other is also seen as a hypersensitive being, a projection of one's own hypersensitivity. This does not favor assertiveness either.