Passion In The Sphere Of Instinct: How Fear Works In The Sexual Subtype

In the psychology of Claudio Naranjo's Enneatypes, the sexual subtype of E6 trait is also called "counterphobic." This adjective underlines a reactive style in which, instead of being in contact with the dominant passion, fear defends itself by reacting to fear through aggressive and belligerent behavior. The motivation is fear, and what he uses to defend himself from the world is to provoke fear; hence, his intimidating and authoritarian appearance.

The term "cowardice" (used by Oscar Ichazo) defines the passion of E6. What distinguishes the counterphobic (sexual) subtype is precisely the feeling of shame that they experience in the face of cowardice.

The Sexual 6 experiences a typical ambivalence regarding contact and withdrawal, both in the relationship with himself and with the world. He has a desire for fusion but is also afraid of it. Thus, the unconscious harbors a desire for intimacy so as not to face the fear of annihilation and the anguish of loneliness.

Ambivalence is more visible in the counterphobic subtype than in the other subtypes because the sexual instinct is more involved, which gives him more energy and greater contact with desire. This great vitality makes him live between self-protection and open rebellion against all kinds of control. He does not renounce his own desire, but he does not develop it either. Rather, he denies fear and the need for intimate union with the other, to whom he approaches with an impulsive and unconscious action, splitting the sentimental aspect.

It is easier for the counterphobic to surrender to a sexual relationship than to a loving one. In any case, tenderness and instinctiveness must be separated in order to handle the two aspects. Naranjo describes the sexual subtype as the one that "escapes against." He approaches sexual intercourse to escape deep intimacy, thus perpetuating his split between action and emotion.

Like a good E6, he creates the illusion that thought has the same value as action ("I think, therefore I do"). But he does so with a defiant style, which allows him to make decisions and take action, feeding his illusion that he is facing pain and fear. He is the most active of

the three subtypes, yet the counterphobic's actions are actually dictated by control and reactivity.

In order to resist his feelings, he becomes emotionally impenetrable: he must show strength in the relationship to keep his distance and not be attacked.

"One of the most ingrained convictions in me is that only through my strength to resist (even pleasure) will I survive. On a sexual level, I never managed to give myself up. Although I have always liked it, I never enjoyed it, convinced that I shouldn't show it since I would lose control and be subjugated. I could give myself to someone only through fantasy. Thus, little by little, I developed a hard body that is apparently refractory to delicacy." (B.)

Aggression and invasion are preventive instruments against threat, and serve as an extreme defense against the precariousness of existence—which is not linked to mere survival but rather to being recognized as an existing individual. It's like living with the idea that one could disappear at any moment for the other. In order not to feel that anticipation of loss, he creates the illusion that if he prevents the other from leaving, he will avoid that anguish. He also anticipates abandonment when he feels that the intimate relationship becomes a threat to his identity, and thus pursues, above all else, an illusion of autonomy.

Megalomania is his way of expressing narcissism. He tends to put himself to the test in various situations, leaving his low self-esteem and fear of "not being capable" unconscious. He wants to prove himself and show that he is not afraid and will not succumb to fear—that he is strong.

Emotions, with their tumultuous and chaotic manifestations, pose the grave danger of coming into contact with the needs of the “inner child.” The counterphobic E6 identifies this with the infantile part that feels fear, which he tries to suffocate, especially because it would lead him to move toward the other, that is, to feel that he needs protection. Emotions triggered by a relationship are frozen and weakened (split) by relying on cognitive ability, which gives the illusion of understanding events and, therefore, of having them under control.

We are not talking about an objective danger, but about the danger of feeling one's own impotence and, therefore, finding oneself under the domination of another; or feeling attraction and, consequently, being forced to tolerate frustration and rejection; or, on the contrary, feeling that the other welcomes you and that you have no way of escaping.

In relationships, passion has its core in the fear of castration, typical of all E6s, which the sexual subtype combats by exposing itself to danger. But this does not happen with courage, rather with a thought that analyzes the behavior of the other and anticipates the damage that could be received. Starting with a cognitively distorted reading of the

other—full of power—and of himself—as a victim—there is no contact with reality; it is mental work that calms anxiety and reveals a strategic and cautious behavior, masked as bravery.

Even when exposed to danger, the Sexual 6 is extremely ambivalent. They display challenging and competitive behaviors, but they never manage to annihilate the "enemy," especially if they have established an important affective relationship. Often, the battle is fought in one's thoughts. He needs his “enemy” to threaten him just so he is able to feel the “force” to exercise control over him and to restore to himself an image congruent with the ego ideal.

The goal of the counterphobic is for the other to understand the legitimacy of his position and agree with him. If this does not happen, or if the affective relationship is too entangled, feelings of hatred or revenge can be fed, which most of the time do not translate into direct action (as an E8 would do) but instead remain in bellicose thoughts, fantasies of destroying the other at the hands of others, or in a search for strategies to disarm the enemy.

Cowardice prevents revenge, but grandiose fantasy makes up for that inhibition.